Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Habits of Happy Men

What makes men happy? If you thought it was all about grilling and beer, well, you wouldn’t be entirely wrong. Our informal poll of a diverse group — chefs and bottlewashers, stock brokers and musicians, bachelors and grand dads — yielded the following short list of 14 fulfilling routines and past times that help make men happy and healthy.


1. Morning exercise

“I relish an hour or more of exercise at the start of the day,” says Mitch M., a seasoned consultant. “That could be walking, working outdoors, or playing tennis — but certainly an active period. It sets up the day for both my body and mind.” Fitness experts have long touted the benefits of morning exercise, which is closely associated with positive mood and sustained energy throughout the day. Men who get active in the a.m. hours are more likely to stick with an exercise regimen, too.


2. Alone time

Spending time with friends and family is a priority among men who describe themselves as happy, but their contentment also depends on finding a few minutes to hold the world at bay. “I always enjoy Sunday morning coffee and a newspaper — on real paper — on the front porch before the rest of the family wakes up,” says Mike Q., a salesman in the New York area. Some guys in our survey seize solitary time to learn or be creative while others want to be alone to “shut off my brain for a while.” Early mornings were a favorite time of day, though early birds and night owls alike savor the quiet moments.


3. Night out with the guys

“One thing that makes me happy is sitting down with a buddy over some drinks and food, talking about nothing,” says Josh M., a California-based M.D. Admittedly, it’s tough to argue the health benefits of chicken wings, fries and beer. But friendships are commonly formed and reinforced on barstools, and the health benefits of male camaraderie are supported by a significant body of research. Behavioral scientists have linked friendship not only to psychological well-being but to longevity.


4. Date night

It may not be the first topic of conversation on pub night, but men can be downright protective of their time with a significant other. Fathers with busy lives at work and home are especially covetous of evenings out with a spouse and report that weekly or bi-weekly date nights help keep the pair connected. Living in the same home doesn’t guarantee adequate time to interact, and a strongly bonded couple requires a relationship independent of their mutual attachment to children. Couples with a dedicated plan for spending time together tend to argue less and are better equipped to resolve tensions when they arise back at the homestead.


5. Games and sports

While men may say that regular ballgames are just a great way to blow off steam, they stand to reap all the benefits of play that children do (social development, honing physical skill sets, promoting mental sharpness) in addition to a long list of physical payoffs. Dr. Stuart Brown, an expert on the subject, has noted that healthy competition in adult play also increases abilities in decision making and problem solving. In his 2009 book Play, Brown writes, “The beneficial effects of getting just a little true play can spread through our lives, actually making us more productive and happier in everything we do.”


6. Getting organized

Leadership seminars and self-help books encourage effective time management for prioritizing tasks, improving productivity, and achieving goals. But you don’t need a life coach to tell you that gaining control over chaos provides peace of mind. Says Doug E., a professor and author, “I especially like writing down what I need to do on a monthly calendar and then crossing things off when they're done.” Doug’s routine does double duty, providing a template for time management and a built-in reward system for looking back over a month of accomplishments.


7. Exercise routine

Having a regular workout routine appears to be a leading source of satisfaction among men. The guys from our poll logged in on a variety of exercise preferences (a good run, biking to work, morning swims, a gym workout). Clearly exercise benefits men inside and out, fortifying the system against chronic diseases, managing weight, improving sexuality, and bolstering mood. Back in 1996, the Surgeon General reported on the many associations between inactivity and diseases including obesity, heart disease, high blood pressure, and stroke. It’s no surprise that inactivity has also been linked to depression and increased anxiety.


8. Generosity and charity

Want to feel good? Try making someone else feel good. Says Alex S., a real-estate consultant, “When I come from a place of giving to others I genuinely feel better about being me…. I try to carry that with me every day, and I’ve developed a way to measure it. I need to get six thank-you’s every single day from different people. If I get a thank-you from someone, then I know I've given something or done something someone else appreciates. I know it's dopey, but it makes me happy.”


9. An indulgent meal

Everyone must be cautioned against overeating, especially on a regular basis, but the occasional big meal — a stack of pancakes, a thick steak, a rich pasta — can be a source of satisfaction for a healthy man. Big meals are part of a longstanding tradition for men, and today’s warriors sometimes deserve a feast after returning home from battle at the office. Mitch P., a chef who routinely serves healthy, locally grown vegetables at his own restaurant, says, “On a quiet Sunday, I’ll flop on the couch and watch football or hockey with a huge, cheesy sandwich. Not the healthiest day off, but I need it.”


10. Down time with family

"It could be just TV time or a family board game — doesn’t matter. Downtime with the family helps keep me happy,” says Erik W., a business owner and father of pre-teen twins. Relaxed family time opens the lines of communication, reinforces the strength of a marriage, and provides an opportunity to decompress. The satisfaction of good parenting can be added to the equation, too, since family time helps kids build self confidence and stave off peer pressure.


11. Meal with family or friends

A good meal in good company is something of a feast for the senses. With positive, pleasure-inducing signals sent from the eyes, ears, nose and mouth, a man’s brain receives the message that the experience is nourishing to both the body and the mind. That, in physiological terms, defines happiness. Says David G., who happens to be a psychologist, “My happiness comes from ephemeral things like sitting around the table with family or friends — no special event, just any old dinner — and seeing everyone enjoying themselves.”


12. Playing an instrument

“Nothing relieves my stress like sitting down on the couch with my guitar and playing until the tension melts away,” says Evan K. of New York City. Accomplished musicians and amateurs alike enjoy the rewards of time spent on an instrument, a mental task that is uniquely well suited to blocking distractions and diminishing intrusive thoughts. Like other creative pursuits such as painting or woodworking, playing an instrument calls on different mental faculties than those tapped during the rest of the day. Several men we polled cited personal creative time as a great diversion and deeply fulfilling.


13. Time with the kids

Maybe it’s because we men really are just overgrown kids, as often characterized, that this category was the leading source of happiness among the dads polled. Anywhere they could catch one-on-time with their children — driving to practice, at the bus stop, during a bedside chat — the experience was genuinely prized and rewarding. “Whatever the topic, it just feels good to have that personal, uninterrupted time with each of my sons,” says Billy F., father of two teenaged boys. Josh S., an account exec, commented, “Discussing the shapes of clouds with my six-year-old is always eye-opening.”


14. Walking

An invigorating walk outdoors is sometimes referred to as a constitutional, meaning “beneficial to bodily constitution.” Lethargy, stress, anxiety and depression all stand to be lessened by getting out into the fresh air and making your body move according to its natural design. “A 30-45 minute walk can be peaceful, and it gets my blood pumping,” says Mike Q. “If I miss a day or two, I feel off.” Health authorities recommend adding as many steps to your day as your age and condition comfortably allow. Even the experts on arthritis, reversing an earlier understanding, frequently suggest walking for relieving pain in arthritic hips and knees.
(from msn.com)

Monday, January 17, 2011

The Point of View of A Korean

As you know, we have plenty of Koreans currently studying in the Philippines to take advantage of our cheaper tuition fees and learn English at the same time.

This is an essay written by a Korean student i want to share with you. (Never mind the grammar; it's the CONTENT that counts) Maybe it is timely to think about this in the midst of all the confusion at present.





MY SHORT ESSAY ABOUT THE PHILIPPINES
Jaeyoun Kim


Filipinos always complain about the corruption in the Philippines. Do you really think the corruption is the problem of the Philippines? I do not think so. I strongly believe that the problem is the lack of love for the Philippines.

Let me first talk about my country, Korea. It might help you understand my point. After the Korean War, South Korea was one of the poorest countries in the world. Koreans had to start from scratch because entire country was destroyed after the Korean War, and we had no natural resources.

Koreans used to talk about the Philippines, for Filipinos were very rich in Asia. We envy Filipinos.

Koreans really wanted to be well off like Filipinos. Many Koreans died of famine. My father & brother also died because of famine. Korean government was very corrupt and is still very corrupt beyond your imagination, but Korea was able to develop dramatically because Koreans really did their best for the common good with their heart burning with patriotism.

Koreans did not work just for themselves but also for their neighborhood and country. Education inspired young men with the spirit of patriotism. 40 years ago, President Park took over the government to reform Korea. He tried to borrow money from other countries, but it was not possible to get a loan and attract a foreign investment because the economic situation of South Korea was so bad. Korea had only three factories. So, President Park sent many mine workers and nurses to Germany so that they could send money to Korea to build a factory. They had to go through horrible experience.

In 1964, President Park visited Germany to borrow money. Hundred of Koreans in Germany came to the airport to welcome him and cried there as they saw the President Park. They asked to him, "President, when can we be well off?" That was the only question everyone asked to him. President Park cried with them and promised them that Korea would be well off if everyone works hard for Korea, and the President of Germany got the strong impression on them and lent money to Korea. So, President Park was able to build many factories in Korea. He always asked Koreans to love their country from their heart.

Many Korean scientists and engineers in the USA came back to Korea to help developing country because they wanted their country to be well off.

Though they received very small salary, they did their best for Korea. They always hoped that their children would live in well off country.

My parents always brought me to the places where poor and physically handicapped people live. They wanted me to understand their life and help them. I also worked for Catholic Church when I was in the army.

The only thing I learned from Catholic Church was that we have to love our neighborhood. And, I have loved my neighborhood. Have you cried for the Philippines? I have cried for my country several times. I also cried for the Philippines because of so many poor people. I have been to the New Bilibid prison. What made me sad in the prison were the prisoners who do not have any love for their country. They go to mass and work for Church. They pray everyday.

However, they do not love the Philippines. I talked to two prisoners at the maximum-security compound, and both of them said that they would leave the Philippines right after they are released from the prison. They said that they would start a new life in other countries and never come back to the Philippines.

Many Koreans have a great love for Korea so that we were able to share our wealth with our neighborhood. The owners of factory and company were distributed their profit to their employees fairly so that employees could buy what they needed and saved money for the future and their children.

When I was in Korea, I had a very strong faith and wanted to be a priest. However, when I came to the Philippines, I completely lost my faith.

I was very confused when I saw many unbelievable situations in the Philippines. Street kids always make me sad,and I see them everyday. The Philippines is the only Catholic country in Asia, but there are too many poor people here. People go to church every Sunday to pray, but nothing has been changed.

My parents came to the Philippines last week and saw this situation. They told me that Korea was much poorer than the present Philippines when they were young. They are so sorry that there are so many beggars and street kids. When we went to Pasangjan,I forced my parents to take a boat because it would fun. However, they were not happy after taking a boat. They said that they would not take the boat again because they were sympathized the boatmen, for the boatmen were very poor and had a small frame. Most of people just took a boat and enjoyed it. But, my parents did not enjoy it because of love for them.

My mother who has been working for Catholic Church since I was very young told me that if we just go to mass without changing ourselves, we are not Catholic indeed. Faith should come with action.

She added that I have to love Filipinos and do good things for them because all of us are same and have received a great love from God. I want Filipinos to love their neighborhood and country as much as they love God so that the Philippines will be well off.

I am sure that love is the keyword, which Filipinos should remember. We cannot change the sinful structure at once.

It should start from person. Love must start in everybody, in a s mall scale and have to grow. A lot of things happen if we open up to love. Let's put away our prejudices and look at our worries with our new eyes.

I discover that every person is worthy to be loved. Trust in love, because it makes changes possible.

Love changes you and me. It changes people,contexts and relationships. It changes the world. Please love your neighborhood and country.

Jesus Christ said that whatever we do to others we do to Him. In the Philippines, there is God for people who are abused and abandoned. There is God who is crying for love. If you have a child, teach them how to love the Philippines. Teach them why they have to love their neighborhood and country. You already know that God also will be very happy if you love others.

That's all I really want to ask you Filipinos.

Monday, January 10, 2011

19 Things You Should "NEVER" Say To A Single Person

Hello dear readers. Happy new year to all of you! It's been a month since I posted here. As "buena mano"  for this year, here is a post which I know some of you will find it helpful when dealing with single people. I don't know if some of you can relate to this, but sometimes, we have said something unintentionally which could annoy or insult them. So, for all people who have single friends and find it difficult to deal with them (sometimes), hope this post can help.

Please don't say: 

1. It happens when you're not looking. (that's just bull)

2. There are plenty of fish in the sea. (oh that will make me feel so much better)

3. So, why are you still single? (and why are you still rude?)

4. You're too picky. (go ahead & kick me while I'm down)

5. You'll find the right person for you. (and that's going to make me feel better too)

6. He's/She's out there. (uh huh)

7. It was just bad timing. (like its so easy to dismiss a guy on such emotionless & objective reason)

8. Just have fun with it! (um, don't tell me how to date in my 30s when you got married at 24)

9. Have you tried online dating? (duh)

10. He/She just wasn't the right guy/gal for you. (I know! That's what I'm complaining about!)

11. Well when my boyfriend/girlfriend & I first met .... (yeah, that really helps to talk about you because I'm SO much like you)

12. When the time is right you will meet someone. (oh so that explains it all)

13. Wow, I wish I were single and in your shoes! (really? I'm pretty sure you CAN be single if you want to be. So if you aren't messing with me out of pity - which I think you are - please go for it!)

14. Your turn next [at weddings] (there's just no response for that)

15. It will happen when you least expect it (uh huh, that will keep me warm at night)

16. Some guy/gal will come along and ruin you career/life plans.(umm I'm getting old and no one has ruined the last 10 years of my life)

17. But you're so pretty/handsome and nice! Why don't you have a boyfriend/girlfriend? (there's just no polite or graceful way to answer that)

18. It just wasn't meant to be. (and that is just so annoying when heard from the mouths of smug married people)

19. You're married right now, right?! (You think?!)